These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.
1. The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said,
"If you were my husband I'd give you poison.
" He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you
will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies
or your mistress."
3. "He had delusions of adequacy."
- Walter Kerr
4. "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
- Winston Churchill
5. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
-Clarence Darrow
6. "He has never been known to use a word
that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest
Hemingway).
7. "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book;
I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas
8. "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
- Mark Twain
9. "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.."
Oscar Wilde
10. "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one."
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.
"Cannot possibly attend first
night, will attend second... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in
response.
11, "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
-Stephen Bishop
12. "He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
John Bright
13. "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
Irvin S. Cobb
14. "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
Samuel Johnson
15. "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
Paul Keating
16. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
Charles, Count Talleyrand
17. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him..." - Forrest Tucker
18. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain
19. "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West
20. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.."
Oscar Wilde
21. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support ...rather .than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
22. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder