Groundhog For Sale--CHEAP!

Instead of parting him out, I'm going to sell my woodchuck to the first person who comes and picks him up. Aprroximately 4 years old, about 35 pounds, shiny brown coat with hints of silver. Is 100% vegetarian, and doesn't make any messes. He pefers to eat green beans and sunflowers, but will probably nibble on other greenery growing in your garden. Please bring your own cage, and heavy duty gloves. He's still feral. This is one heck of a deal, and the opportunity of a lifetime. Oops...I think I meant to post this on Ebay. No reserve and no minimum bid.

My 60 lb part Border Collie would love to have a go at him...she's nailed 3 of them so far.

Chipmunks! We've got chipmunks! All the chipmunks you'll ever need!
Lifetime supply. They ARE going fast but we've got PLENTY more.
Be the first on your block to have a matching set.
Be the first on your block to have a chipmunk cricket team.
Be the ......................... to have a chipmunk rugby scrimmage.
Be the ......................... to run the chipmunks at Pamplona.

We have the all-natural answer to tightly packed lawns. For an unlimited time only, we are giving away, free, moles. That's right, you pick your own, as many as you want. Never rent an aerator for your lawn again. These little guys will keep your sod and turf freshly turned, churned, and loose all year long.
But wait, there's more! And more and more. Once you got them, your worries are over. Feel the wonderful sensation of sinking into loose turf every time you walk on your yard. Hurry, supplies are unlimited!

I'll swap you an armadillo for a woodchuck. Pork on the halfshell as they say

Ladies and gentlemen --
Do not allow anyone to sell you a used Magnette Marmot sedan.
Please do not allow those purveyors of various scurrilous varmits to distract you from the finest sports rodent known to man.
I am, of course, describing the sports Grand Tourissimo model of chipmunk.
Aerodynamic, low ground clearance, rapid acceleration and....
Ta Dah.... racing stripes and a wheelie bar !!!

Wray, You can wipe out them moles with bubble gum. Just make holes in their runs and drop it in, no danger to dogs digging for the moles or anything else other than mice. Moles and mice will eat bubble gum, it clogs up their innards, and they die. The root of your mole problem is grubs in your yard, moles eat them. Wipe out the grubs and the moles will go elsewhere to find them.

John, I will defer to your knowledge on MGs but not moles. I've never heard of bubble gum but anything's worth a try. Moles do indeed love grubs. They love earthworms more. They love insects of any kind. They are adaptive as hell and can figure out a mole trap in a heartbeat. I used every insecticide on the market, short of nuclear waste, and killed every insect in the lawn. The moles just tore the lawn up more in their frenzy to try and find their lunch. I've even tried the mole repellent that has castor oil in it. They laugh at such measures and mock my efforts.
Actually, the small success I've had is by spiking them early in the spring. If I can take 3 or 4 out of a main tunnel then the rest of the season isn't so bad. But, we don't have a real winter here so most of the year is mole time.
What I'd like to try is the lasso type of trap but I haven't been able to find them.
Usually, I'll just cuss them and then go work on the B.

My father had a foolproof method for eliminating moles. He planted castor beans and the moles would eat the poisonous roots and die.

Sam, it's my understanding that moles are primarily insect eaters and don't consume roots. But, they are repelled by castor bean extracts, etc. which I've had some limited success with.
I'll sterilize the lawn, use the grub killing fungus, put bubble gum in their tunnels, and plant castor beans if it will work. Just one season without them shredding the yard would be wonderful.

For other ideas on how to remove moles, refer to that great horticultural reference "Caddyshack".

I used to have moles, too. Think they all drowned. Don't miss them a bit

Wray: Failing all the above - castor beans, fungus, bubble gum (!), etc. - you may want to consult a shaman and just have them banned! AL Bradley

Al. down here we go down to the far reaches of Wadmalaw Island and consult with a Root Doctor. "Puttin' de Root" on something or someone is a serious proposition.

Wray -- you're right, moles are insectivores. As such, I don't mind them *that* much. The problem comes in when VOLES come along and use the mole tunnels (as well as digging their own) and eat plant roots. I've had big, healthy plants that wilt and die overnight, and find that I can just lift them straight out of the ground -- they've no roots at all.

Last spring I trapped 26 of the little buggers using mouse traps baited with peanut butter. I put the traps next to the holes in the garden, and then covered them with inverted clay pots to make it nice and dark. I put a rock or a brick over the drain hole to make it pitch black in there, so they'd think they're still in their tunnel. I'd have to empty the traps once, sometimes twice a day....

Rob, I tried the PB trick for moles with no results. Were you trapping Voles with the PB/mouse trap?

Maybe moles don't eat castor bean roots, but planting castor beans will drive the moles away. I suppose you could make some heavy duty motor oil out of the castors, if you follow the old Castrol formula.

Wray,
I was going after the voles. Here's a page put out by my Alma Mater:

http://www.ces.ncsu.edu/nreos/wild/wildlife/animals/mammals/voles.htm

Now what an informative thread. Where else can you get this kind of entertainment? Sure beats the hell out of the most recent reality show.

JTB

Seriously - it works! Apparantly, moles don't like human urine. The suggested method is to water their "hills" with a 50% urine/water solution. I simply went out at night and peed on the hills - it was fun, and it worked, and my wife got a big laugh out of it.

This is, apparantly, a male-only solution!

I suppose we had better set up a Bail Bond Fund for Wray if he tries Eric's method. I'm sure the local constabulary will believe him after putting up with sailors for all these years.